GERMAN FKK CLUB TIPS
PLANNING A TRIP TO GERMANYS BEST FKK SAUNA CLUBS
(This is a work in progress so check back for changes and updates)
First you'll have to decide the logistics
1. Public Transportation
2. Renting a Car
3. Take the tour
Not for the less traveled novice, it helps to know some German language. Your trip will revolve around your transportation since train, subway and buses do not run 24 hours. Clubs on the other hand are open till 5am long after your last bus or train. So keep this in mind when planning your visit. Should you miss a train or bus you may be looking at a short to long delay till the next one. If you plan on buying your train tickets online, note the requirements (printed copies) credit cards and identification needed for online tickets. Does your hotel have a printer? Take into consideration the location of your hotel when using public transportation, hotels in the center of towns are often closer to main train and bus stations. Also consider main train stations and city centers have higher crime rates so take care when walking at night and where you walk.
Long and short distance Trains
German Train system
Location, location, depending on your selected transportation method where you book a hotel is important. City centers are best when using public transportation since they are often close to main train and bus stations. However if you'll be renting a car parking is often sparse (include parking fines) and costly in city centers. While shopping the internet make sure your hotel has its own bath and shower. While less common now lower priced older hotels had community toilets and showers. Does the price of your hotel include breakfast, while not important to everyone sometimes this will affect the cost. Ask about taxes, sometimes up to 20% can be added to bill once you arrive.
When renting a car in Germany consider the total cost, plus the fact that driving in Germany differs from the US. Fuel can cost as much as $8.00US per gallon which adds up quickly and sometimes surpasses the cost of the actual rental. If you opt out of the insurance at the counter make sure you inspect your vehicle before you drive away. Note that small dings, waves and even stone chips are considered damage. If you accept the car when you arrive with any such damage without insurance you'll be billed a minimum fee of 600 Euros. So inspect the car in detail and have staff note the damage on your rental agreement. We've never checked for a spare tire when we picked up rental cars in the US but on one occasion in Germany the spare was missing. Upon returning the vehicle we were told the tire was missing and billed 1800 Euros. Once you find yourself a victim of such insane penalty fees you'll understand why we're telling you this. If you don't own your own GPS with German maps its wise to book a GPS from the rental agency, usually about 10 Euros extra per day. Make sure you have the proper address info when you arrive which you'll be required to enter into the GPS. Ask staff to walk you thru changing all settings from German to English.
DRIVING IN GERMANY
Driving in Germany differs from the US. A. Always keep to the right when on the autobahns, Its the law. The left lane is basically for passing. Cars will and legally can pass you in the left lane going over 200kph. Don't flash your head lights, honk your horn or give someone the finger. German law sees this as road rage and made it against the law. There is no need for a citation or trial, anyone can take down your license number and file a report which will appear as a huge fine on your rental car agreement.
When in doubt EXIT, this advise comes due to the fact that sometimes exits are far apart (more then 20km) and if you miss your exit you might have problems getting off. Obey all speed signs, while German autobahns do have sections of unlimited speed these are often interrupted with speed restricted zones. Photo radar is common on German autobahns as well as in small villages, towns and cities. You might only see a flash of light which means its too late only later you're credit card will be billed a fine by the rental car agency including added administration fees. Even if you don't see parking restriction signs many German cities now require a paid parking permit no matter where you park (no warning signs required). However you will get the satisfaction of a paper ticket which will be placed on your windshield. We've also encountered parking violations where you're not issued a ticket, a photo is taken of your vehicle to show location and violation after which only a fine is billed to you.
If you drink even one beer think again about driving in Germany, clubs almost all offer beer (as much as you can drink) and should you even have one beer and be stopped by local police you'll suffer major consequences. Its not uncommon for police to set up random check points at any hour of the day or night. Often these are set up near clubs along common roadways leading to the clubs. Police know people drink at the clubs and often target them with such check points. Pay attention to where you park, how fast you drive and where you're going.
Driving in the US is easier than Europe since roadways are based on the quad system (square blocks) rather then Europe where streets circle around the center. Most German cities have many one way streets and streets that rarely follow a straight line. This can be confusing and dangerous for unfamiliar drivers. Even GPS may give you instructions to head down the wrong direction so pay close attention to one way signs. Entering an address in your GPS should be done with great care, most cities have streets with the same names (common names). Should you enter a club address with the wrong address you might find yourself on a wild goose chase or worse having wasted hours of time and expensive fuel.
GPS (must include German map version)
Clubs, Addresses, hours of operation,
Cell Phone, SIM card
Taking the tour
Having a cell phone (called a handy or Mobile) in Germany adds costs but saves time, money and aides in your travel, calling ahead to ensure the club is open, how many women are working, difficulty in finding the club are all reasons to invest in a cheap pay as you go phone. Often you can find these phones on the internet before you travel. You can also buy one at the airport or local town when you arrive. Look for cellular carrier services.
Note someone might answer your call and not speak a word of English.
BEST ADVICE FOR FIRST TIME VISITORS
When you visit a club remember this:
"When in Rome do as the Romans"
The idea is take the time to watch what locals do and don't do. Tourists and newbies almost always stand out by the stupid things they do. Don't go places where no one else is going, don't expect a door to be locked or a chain to be blocking and entrance. Your not at home so don't open every door just because it's there. If you're unsure then ask first. Often private rooms are off limits to guests unless accompanied by a woman.
Clean up after yourself, its common even at Mc Donald's in Europe that when finished people bus their own table. Racks are provided for trays, trash, glasses and containers. Note in the clubs what people are doing with their plates when done eating. If in doubt bring your plate to the kitchen or bar area.
We've been pioneers in getting the clubs to open their doors to foriengners. Many clubs were reluctant due to the communication barrier which has and still causes problems.
When leaving the club deposit club shoes and towels in provided containers. If in doubt look inside the provided containers for shoes or towels. If you can't find them ask.
Learn the basic words in German such as
Thank you "danke"
No Thank You "Nein Danke"
BASIC INFORMATION, COMMON QUESTIONS, MYTHS AND TRUTHS
Do women have the right to refuse service to a guest?
YES, Absolutely. We've heard so called experts on the internet tell people that women are not allowed to refuse service. This is totally false and against the law. Women pay an entry fee just like the customers and have the right to refuse service and stop providing service if they wish. The club is not going to take your side as a customer since the women are also customers. While this rarely happens take rejection as a positive since you don't want a women who obviously does not like you servicing you.
Do I have have to pay for service if I allow a women to begin oral on me before I go to a room?
YES, when you allow an act to take place you're therefore acknowledging acceptance. Should you have this problem and take it to the front desk to complain these are the considerations.
1. Did you approach the woman?
2. Did you ask the woman to come to you?
3. How long did the act go on?
4. Why did you not say "NO" or stop?
Anytime you approach a woman or go sit by her you're taking up her time and keeping her from being with other guests or making money. This differs from women who come to you and sit by you on their own intentions. Women will do this looking for business or to introduce themselves. If a woman asks you if she can sit by you consider it's also a opening that says "You're interested". If you're not interested you're better off being polite and refusing any aggressive women.
What do you do if you are not satisfied with the service provided by a woman?
If its really bad the sooner you stop the better as that will be one of the questions "If it was so bad why did you continue" Which the girl will respond "If you did not like what I was doing why did you continue?". Your problem can only be addressed by the front desk staff so don't waste time going to the bar or involving service staff in the club. This is where having a fluent German speaker is invaluable. See your guide or translator if you're on a tour. If your complaint is about time, some of the time you'll win, you're entitled to 30 minutes for 50 Euros, however some women will insist that once you pop your time is over. Some management will side with the girl and some will side with "you paid for 30 minutes so you should get 30 minutes". Since the outcome can vary club by club. "I did not finish or she did not get me off". Going to the room does not require a girl to get you off, although that is the intention and goal. Some guests will get drunk or go to the room several times and then expect a woman to get them off regardless. Outcome will usually be there is no guarantee, did she try? That's good enough.
Example: I once had a girl approach me, invite me to the room for great sex. Once in the room she began oral and noticed I was too big for her. She then declined to have sex due to this. I told her I came to the room specifically for sex. She said she would only provide oral. I told her this was not acceptable and told her lets go the the front desk. Sometimes just letting the woman know you're going to the front desk to report a problem solves the problem. At the front desk I explained I had a problem, they had a manager step aside with me and the woman. I gave my side of the story and she gave her side of the story. The solution was the girl did in fact perform oral for a period of time. However the girl was not able to complete what she had promised, thus I was asked if spliting the difference was acceptable. I was to pay her only 25 Euros instead of 50. While this was not the best option I agreed. There is a fine line where the club has to keep both the woman and the customer happy. The club works with these women on a daily basis and if the girl is unhappy or feels she has been treated unfairly she can leave the club and work somewhere else. Years ago when there were not so many clubs management had more influence however today the women can make or break a club.
GETTING THE BEST SERVICE
We expect the women to be clean, smell good, treat us well and give us great service. Its been proven that if you wash well, use deorderant, use cologne, trim your hand and toe nails and brush your teeth chances are you'll get better service. Nothing is more of a turn off then bad breath, dirty teeth, BO or an unbathed body.
The number one anwser issue we get from women about men in over 20 years is "men who are not clean or smell bad". This will always result is less time, poor service and even refusal of service.
Don't brush your teeth right before going to the room. Brush them at the hotel long before going to a club. The reason for this is brushing your teeth causes micro abrasions which make it easier for infection and bleeding. Its best to brush at the start of the day and use mouth wash during your visit to freshen up.
DRINK LOTS OF FLUIDS
There are many reasons for this. One is to replenish your liquids from sweating and loss of body fluids. The other is for safety reasons. Its common knowledge that after receiving oral sex (without condom) urinating right after (within minutes) a strong stream of urine will flush out any possible STD, germs etc. This is not 100% but has been proven to be very effective.
KEEP YOUR URINARY TRACK HEALTHY
Cranberry extract or dried cranberries are proven to clean and protect your urinary tract. Its a good idea to stock up on these gel capsules before you depart for your trip and consume several of them each day while on your trip. They can be found at most health stores or herbal remedies sections at stores.
UNPASTURIZED APPLE CIDER VINEGAR CAPSULES OR LIQUID
Known to be the cure for many things and used for hundreds of years unpasteurized Apple Cider
(Braggs Brand is best)
MORE SAFE SEX TIPS
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